Treat yourself like you matter

In a recent coaching session, a client and I were trying to get to the bottom of why they were feeling more tired than usual which was causing problems for them at home and in work. Amongst other things we talked about the importance of taking regular holidays to rest and recharge the batteries.

Client:  I don’t know about you, but I find I don’t really begin to switch off until at least three or four days in to my holiday.

Coach: When’s the last time you took a two-week break?

Client: Ten years ago.

This client’s story isn’t unusual.  People, including many successful leaders, put off, don’t plan, or don’t do what they know is good for them all of the time.

Why is that?

I borrowed and shortened the title of this blog from one of the chapters in clinical psychologist Jordan Peterson’s best-selling book 12 Rules for Life: “Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping”.  In it he suggests that whilst the cynics amongst us might think that everyone is out for themselves (and perhaps some people are), there are many people who neglect their own personal care, whilst simultaneously putting the needs of other people or other causes first.

And when you think about it, who hasn’t found themselves at one time or another putting the next deadline, the next project, or even the next email ahead of their own need to rest and re-fill the tank?  The constant in-the-moment demands of work can make us feel like there isn’t time to look after ourselves, but when we reflect, we know this isn’t a good long-term strategy, or one we’d recommend helping our friends or colleagues.

Below are 6 questions you can ask to see how well you’re looking after yourself.  Is it time to treat yourself like someone you’re responsible for helping?

What have I achieved in work today that’s helped me make progress?

How well am I sleeping?

How disciplined am I around eating/drinking healthily and getting plenty of exercise?

What have I done to unwind in the last week?

When’s the last holiday I took?

When’s the next holiday I’m taking?

Coaching provides time and space for people to reflect on what’s important to them and see problems from new perspectives.  If you’ve found this article interesting or would like to know more about how coaching could help you, keep an eye on these blogs or drop an email to info@sapiencoaching.com